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i'm going to cry! i'm going to burst! i'm going to throw up!

by NAIF

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1.
(never) keep your mouth closed we are born baby, broken in two we try to grow, try to change our view we were all raised wrong & dragged up the stairs left on the stage with no idea no one is better than anyone else the power structures we lean into don’t define us and don’t have too so keep ya hands outside the vehicle never keep your moth closed try not to hurt others exist without harm no one is better than anyone else don’t clap these songs its not what they’re for weaponise your privilege and help break down these walls there an unconscious bias that we need to address fix the disparity thats exists in your/every industry pleasantries, you’ve failed me keeping peace, you’ve failed me waiting patiently, you’ve failed us lets destroy the systems that are failing us
2.
i lived a life of natural causes and i died eventually i just gave up and got on with hiding my true personality nurture curved the nature inside of me now a brief chance at authenticity i buried it down down in my chest at times it was hard to breathe but you were next to me your hand on my knee, you're in the divers seat nurture curved the nature inside of me now a brief chance at authenticity you are enough so much more than enough you are enough and oh so loved i am stronger than you know you are so strong and it shows your life is a testament to your hard work and time spent.
3.
turning blue from the inside out you heart it breaks your finger starts to rot forever youre low skin starts to crack your paranoia keeps you right off the track run it into the ground poison the ones who feed you hide in a different crowd the soft love it turns you blue your hand is ice cold gentle to touch our bodies repel each other naturally enough arms get sore waiting still hanging on waiting for change in a heart thats not ready for love run it into the ground poison the ones who feed you hide in a different crowd the soft love it turns you blue we cant grow if we cant reflect on the hurt caused and the time spent i wanted to wait for you but now im done i cant wait for heart thats not ready for love run it into the ground poison the ones who feed you hide in a different crowd the soft love it turns you blue
4.
you and i are made of the same things in different cycles different stages if a glass can spill only what it contains empty me out and start again change the cup replenish the source hydrate the body if it hurts do it once do it twice compare the steam to the ice there are different forms of water all serving their own purposes there are no conclusions in a constant stream it flows im worried about being read outside of me, my fear it shows if a glass can spill only what it contains empty me out and start again change the cup replenish the source hydrate the body if it hurts do it once do it twice compare the steam to the ice there are different forms of water all serving their own purposes do it once do it twice compare the steam to the ice
5.
6.
7.
this is the final stage of growth there is nowhere else to go you've ignored my existence wasted my time, burnt my rope a failure to thrive a failure to bond we go around you failing me failing you failing me i didn't want to believe that it had got as bad as it did but i couldn't ignore it anymore you were destroying us all a failure to thrive a failure to bond we go around you failing me failing you failing me take this hand throw it away again dig dig dig you make your own grave
8.
the ego is shattered we do not exist without the other only when shared is the happiness real i am still learning fall down seven times ill stand up eight i yearn to be more than this never ending hate but i am still learning not without love i swear i haven’t lost it i am nothing without our daily functions fall down seven times ill stand up eight
9.
donate my body to science

about

written & recorded by naif jamie in the autumn of 2018

this album is centred around the concepts of longevity and survival, and about how we go about achieving those things. the album is a reflection on goodness and what that really means to be good, its about losing loved ones, its about loved ones using your love and taking you for granted. this is album is about the fleeting and comparatively, eternal nature of friendships. this album is about the panic and nausea of everyday life and how we all can, if we work at it, get through it.

oxox
naif

"I'm going to cry. I'm going to burst. I'm going to throw up." is a quote from my fictional dear friend Megan Gwynn aka Pixie of the X-Men.

credits

released April 4, 2018

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

NAIF Sydney, Australia

naïf
(nʌɪˈiːf,nɑːˈiːf)

adjective
1.
naive or ingenuous.

a transgender woman, a sad song generator.

www.facebook.com/naifthehuman/

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